Cognitive Coaching

What?

We chat, and I give you my full attention while helping you become who you want to be. There's no 5-step process or framework.

These are open conversations about what you've been thinking about, in any domain of life - conversations jump from education to AI, climate change to ETH, spirituality to neuroscience, relationships to astrophysics. They span across personal, professional, and philosophical topics.

Depending on what we are talking about, I either take notes as we speak, or make notes from recordings later on. Some clients send me recordings of other conversations and other material as well.

Afterwards, I dig into some of the topics that came up, architecting how they fit together from your point of view. I'm not working through an analytic lens, comparing what you say to academic standards or mental models, or looking for anything in particular. I'm simply allowing myself to understand your bodymind, how you think, and the topics you think about. So I can help you get where you want to go.

I speak with regular "live" clients weekly for 90 minutes, and leave room in my schedule to overrun on occasion. At present, due to my family sailing plans, I'm not taking on new "live" clients. But I'm open to one-off conversations with follow-up by video-message for anyone who thinks I can help them.

I'm offering this with a choose-your-own price coaching session (thanks for the idea, Rob). Bring something you want to talk through, and we'll chat.  You'll get a taste of what working with me is like, and you can choose what to pay or give me in return afterwards. If you don't get any value or insights, then don't pay anything!

Why?

In weeks:

While we talk, I help you see through the noise around you, to what is most pertinent and meaningful to you. And to recognize the world as it is (messy) - not as you'd like it to be or fear that it is. I help you find clarity about what matters to you; and where you need it, validation around what you "know", too.

What our conversations offer to your internal world depends entirely on your starting point.

In months:

I reflect how you are thinking back at you, and suggest other work to help you think better. What "better" means here depends entirely on you, it might be around self-awareness in the moment, conceptual clarity, reducing inconsistencies, using your body to think, supplementation, biohacking, retraining your intuition to respond differently to situations or areas of life, speeding up your thinking, resolving (&/or accepting) internal conflicts, bringing in others... there's a lot we could work on or I could point you towards, only some of which really matters to you.

I build your knowledge-base from my notes for you to refer back to (or we collaborate on this, if you already have a personal knowledge-base). I can then work as a knowledge-coach or tutor, connecting the dots for you, adding context, or challenging and fact-checking. We can co-produce work, too. I'm helping one client write a couple of books; and my team distiled the knowledge of another to help them slowly extract themselves from a mid-size business.

Over time:

I help you use your attention to become your aspirational self. How you attend shapes who you are, which shapes how you attend tomorrow. It becomes a self-reinforcing cycle: the easy path is to just follow it. I'll help you forge your own path, taking control of your attention and shifting who you are, which leads to a new self-reinforcing cycle. One in which your attention naturally directs itself to what is good for you, reinforcing the attributes you value, and helping you live the life you want.

Our brains are far more flexible than most people realize, and attention is one key to changing them. Attention has that power because your subconscious learns what is salient to you from how (and how intensely) you attend. And when you rest, the salient-thing gets written into you. That's how deliberate practice works for skill-development. Focused attention can work similarly for self-development.

Add in some work helping you listen to the intuitive suggestions you learnt to tune out at school, and other interoceptive data that’s probably outside your awareness right now, and we can re-train your intuition. So that you get to the point where their automatic responses in nearly all situations are "the best" for you.

That frees your mind up to focus on what matters most to you, and live a Deep Life. One in which you spend most of your time immersed, with an effortless skill at the art of living how you want to live. And the secure knowledge that without thinking too much, you’ll live and act in a way that is aligned with who you want to be. You’ll make the right decisions, by your own standards, intuitively. And simply live, at peace, immersed, present...

I bring...

Empathy and a deep understanding of how our bodyminds work. Which allows me to understand where you're coming from and what you're feeling. Long-term clients joke that I have their mind in mine.

A remarkably wide knowledge-set and interest-set, and an ability to learn quickly. If you find something fascinating or important, I'll almost certainly share both your understanding and enthusiasm.

A radically open mind on pretty much any topic. Allied with an ability to suspend my disbelief if we start from different places while you explain, and a deep respect for viewpoints that differ.

An outside view. I'm not in your social, cultural or political circle, and don't hold (m)any positions too deeply to question.

Absolute discretion and privacy.

My ideal client:

Wants to 'do good' for the people and systems around them (or maybe the world). I won't work with anyone who doesn't aspire to this.

Has a long history of deep self-development, and isn't finished yet. I might work with people who, like me, had a remarkably lucky emotional-upbringing, but not often.

Has expertise in something that stretches way beyond what I know at present.

Has interesting things to talk about beyond their personal and professional spheres, and is comfortable talking about what they know.

What's next?

I'm not taking on new regular clients until August 2023. If some of the above resonated, subscribe to my newsletter. I'll be sharing what I can for those who can't afford my attention through this website and the connected newsletter; and will let subscribers know when I'm open to coaching clients or launch my course, too.

In the meantime, I'm open to one-off conversations with follow-up by video-message where that fits around my family's sailing plans. I'm offering this with a choose-your-own price coaching session (thanks for the idea, Rob). Bring something you want to talk through, and we'll chat.  You'll get a taste of what working with me is like, and you can choose what to pay or give me in return afterwards. If you don't get any value or insights, then don't pay anything!

Side-note for anyone who is reading this because they think they have a similar skillset to me - get in touch, I would love to know you.